If you have been with the Lord Apollon for some time, after the often initial reaction to flee from His glory, you may find a very different expression of His personality, waiting just below the surface of what you had first encountered. He waits there with open arms to embrace you, and to entangle you in His gravity, where you will orbit Him like any loyal satellite.
It is often the kindness of our Lord that most surprises those who are new to this face. But what could rightly come next after the harsh truth of His nature? After the pursuit, after the tearing of the flesh, did He not seek your surrender? In giving all of ourselves to our Lord, we make ourselves open to receive His many gifts. Our Prince is a generous God. Generously doting, generously affectionate, and has been known to subsume His loves, taking them into Himself, and into ecstasy.
It is not hubristic to accept the love of a God. It is not harmful to Hellenic Polytheism for the mortal brides/loves of our God to been seen and heard, because from my experience, it is typically the God who makes the request (or demand) for those intimate details to be shared. And even in those instances where it was up to the devotee, it is not necessarily a cry for attention, or any other inane fantasy. The fact, is that we are loved, and the excitement of having that love in our lives bleeds out into our words, and everyday interactions. It can make some people quite uncomfortable to witness a relationship so unlike their own being enthusiastically embraced. For whatever personal reasons they may have, our love and excitement are met with screams of “Special Snowflakes!” As if we were all out proclaiming that our loves were the pinnacle, or the model from which all should be molded. Such attitudes toward us are unwarranted, in most cases.
We all know what can happen when someone loses sight of themselves, or loses sight of their humanity, in reference to bridal mysticism, so let me state, outright, here and now, that I am not special. But, neither are you.
Apollon has many, many mortal loves. Each of us brings a little something different into His heart. But, while we are each unique, and loved for our uniqueness, there also is a kind of commonality between the lot of us. It is this commonality which causes the most friction, not between us and more mainstream devotees, but amongst ourselves.
None of us are loved above the others, and yet He may make us feel like the most important thing at any given moment. His love reaches so far into our hearts, that it may not even be possible for us to deny the special feelings it induces. And why should we? Our relationships with Him are our own. However, any human being who says (no matter how beloved of their God they may be) that they alone could be the focal point of their God’s affections, is lying with malicious intent.
Do not trust the shallow and purposefully misleading words of the insecure. To puff oneself up at the expense of others who share similar doxa, is just silly, and it makes those who engage in it look more the fool. If Lord Apollon treats you like a princess (or a prince), then accept it. Enjoy it. Revel in it. But you are but one princ(ess) among many. We must remain mindful of the simple fact that all of us are special to Him, and yet, none of us are special. There is not a single one of us that He could not live without. There is not a single one of us, whom He can not replace. And there is not a single one of us who holds a monopoly on His affection.
More importantly, if someone tells you that your God told them something explicitly about you, with no prompting or questioning from the claimant, you can take that as an immediate red flag. Gods do not go around spreading gossip about Their humans, to Their other humans. I mean, really, folks. Anyone who throws out vague warnings like: “Deity X said [insert painful non-truth] about you, and They would never lie to me…”, is a lying liar who is most likely nursing some kind of personal wound, or petty jealousy. Let me repeat: Gods don’t gossip with Their devotees, about Their devotees.
So, in a few words: trust Apollon, or Whomever your God may be, and for Gods’ sake, don’t drink the haterade.